Call me weird but I have been pondering about something for quite some time. My daughter is 1 is she a toddler? I mean I am far from one of those moms that counts months. If you were to walk up to me and say my child is 46 I’m going to give you the blank stare. Yes I am one of them. Once zoii started walking I said that’s no baby and I started calling her a toddler.
The age of a toddler
Believe it or not this i a very common question in the motherhood community. Especially the first time moms so you and I, we are not alone. A toddler is a child from 12 to 36 months.
I prefer the easier way 1 to 3 years. So with that in mind my baby is in fact a toddler. It’s not a big deal or anything but this is a milestone for me. Becoming a mom of three I just knew I wouldn’t make it. I knew this wasn’t true but i was simply a thought. A common one I think that most moms deal with.
Expectations Tsk, Tsk
Now that we have established the toddler crisis, are you ready for what comes next? When your child turns one generally you will start to see them do a variety of things. If they are not doing them already.
Glitter, Sparkle 1
At this age you child should be able to
sit down without assistance
Crawl on both hands and knees (some may even be walking)
Pull themselves up utilizing furniture
Are you excited because I definatley am. Need I not say that maybe it’s best for you to baby proof your home. We do not want any sharp corners harming anyone.
I don’t know about you but I feel like I just accomplished something great. Random thought it’s not like I haven’t been through this before. It’s just something about being able to relive it has me over the moon.
We are in that phase mama where you tell your toddler no and she literally has a moment of weakness. She simply cannot understand why she can’t do what she wants. I am okay with that but when she starts being extra now we have a problem.
Zoii has been throwing her little tantrums for a period of time now that she is 1 and walking. Today I saw something new from her. Drinking juice in the living room she began to spill it. So what is your first instinct because mine is I don’t want to be stuck cleaning up spilled juice. So mommy took it, yes but that doesn’t make me a bad person. Zoii looked at me and the n she tuned up like one of those old fire fighter trucks back in time. She looked at me mama’s not budging on this sorry hon. No lie she instantly stopped crying and turned to me and slapped me.
She did what?
Yes she slapped mama, I looked at my husband and I said did you see that? I mean I was in complete shock. Maybe because my other girls never did this they common crying of course but hitting nope. I looked at her we have eye contact, I took to fingers and taped her little hands.
Disciplined capital “D”
I know some parents may be against spanking, popping but I learned from my previous mistakes. My 7 year old grew up fast and before I knew it she was mouth all mighty tongue everlasting. Me and my husband were like oh we don’t want to spank our kids. The reason being we used to get spankings when we were little.(its not uncommon just not spoken of openly) I mean who wants that, but I’ve come to realization that from those spanking I learned a valuable lesson. Stop Being Dumb, you get spankings for dumb things so the only solution would be to stop doing them. My daughter was living proof or lacking discipline. Yes I was that mouthy kids mom but that ship quickly sailed.
Don’t Prejudge Me
This is what I believe to be true but I do believe that discipline is a Must when it comes to your children. You can only take but so much, so I stopped feeling bad for popping my kids hands or spanking them. Only when it is needed, like if I told you a billion times not to do something. Then when you get in trouble you expect there to be no consequences.
That’s Just Down Right Bananas.
Raise sweet little humans, mine are from Mars
I do understand that you want you child to behave and yes it starts with you. It takes a village to raise a child or at least that is what I was raised on. The outcome of this would be that enstilling certain traits and behaviors in our littles now could mean less problems in motherhood, parenthood later on down the line.
Think about it, what type of forms of discipline do you use for tantrums?
For the longest time I have always wanted to do yoga. I suppose I was my own greatest enemy in this. Every time I would think about starting up again, I would tell myself little untruths. They would go a little something like the kids will never let you do it, when would you have the time, you should probably learn meditation first…..
So many times this has stopped me from doing what I want to do. I suffer from anxiety and so yoga is an outlet for me and another way for me to express myself through movement.
Now I have given this much thought and the time is now. I mean what am I waiting for exactly? I’m just waisting time instead of bettering myself and my health.
As I am sitting here getting my thoughts together and anxiously waiting for the app to download. At this point I don’t know what to expect and so I just wait. By the way for those of you who are waiting for the app I am definately sharing. Yea it’s that good, it’s called Do You.
I am super excited to start this. I know that it may be hard at first but I am my own worst enemy and best motivator. As long as I keep pushing forward and doing hat matters to me as well I can accomplish it all.
I put my plan into motions and I started reaching out to some of the moms. You can always find yoga moms on instagram. Inspiring other moms that you can be fit, calm, motivated, and mom. This one profile in particular that I follow is awesome and I love her good vibes. You can check her out @withlovemarisaa. I asked her abou it and she directed me to this app that she used when she started out. She was super nice and willing to help even though she didn’t know me from a can of peas.
This app even goes as far as letting you set up your own goals. As you can see I am simply just starting but I have chosen to do the beginners program. Follow the teachers as they provide you the guidance that you need. After completing this program I am going to venture onto another challenge.
I thought that just to be safe if we did go to a trail it would have to be a trail with not a lot of people. So i’m thinking well because all this caous is going on with covid the trails would be scarce. Obviously I was wrong, and o we ended up going to two trails. When we arrived at the first one I felt it was too crowded and I am all about protecting my little’s. I decided we can just go to another one no biggie. Luckily I remembered this little trail nestled within my neighborhood that is safe enough for kids. So that is where we went, and the kids loved it.
Let it Soar
As we explored the park I could see the excitement and curiousity all over there faces. Then you look at me and I have this like stuck confused plastered look on my face because I’m in mommy survival mode. I had to learn the hard way that everything doesn’t have to be so serious. I did encourage them to explore different things that I knew would not be harmful to them. We had a chance to learn about Rocks, Rivers, and Creeks.
Covid Nature says You Suck!
I mean this is really beginning to suck. Being cooped up in the house for fear of getting sick. This pandemic has really hit below the belt. Now as we sit around waiting for some good news we have to be proactive. For us who has children we have to be twice that. In the beginning I had huge ideas that we can do being as though I thought this would be over soon. I soon found that out the hard way as I’m sure many of us did. Being as though I am a nature mind and I love taking nature and wildlife photography I decided that we should incorporate trails in our day. We normally commit to doing these anyway because our kids love them and me too.
Are trails safe right now with covid going on? Yes, I mean it’s simply you being out in nature no playgrounds or anything. Not unless you are expecting to be sneezed on by a tree. I think your good to go.
Exercise and Education?
Being as though kids are no in school this is an awesome way to tie science and physical education together. I always up for a two for one deal.
There is nothing wrong with a little nature run. At the end of this road with be much more fun.
When you think of morning regime what comes to mind. You may be thinking you beauty regime right. A lot of people refer to morning regime mainly as beauty not accompanied by getting dressed of course. That portion had been completed the night before.
There are a variety of different regimes in which you can do. Mine consist of cleaning.
In the mornings I like to have time for myself. Being able to clean and make sure that my home is in order helps me and my family to relax better. It’s considered to be therapeutic.
Each morning it is always normally the same, believe it or not structure plays an important role even as your and adult. I have heard people say that they believe this not to be true but it is.
Yes I do wash clothes early in the a.m. My husband calls me “The Washing Zombie” because I am normally up around 4 a.m.
However washing a load in the morning can eliminate the time you lose with your family. Yes it is a tedious process so the sooner the better. Even with a family of 5 I am constantly washing this helps me get ahead.
I am one of those moms that sometimes get extremely tired. I have been struggling to gain sleep for quite some time.So when my kids drift off to sleep I sometimes follow.
I have tried to be consistent in washing my dishes at night but sometimes I result to mornings. I will rinse my dishes but still leave them till morning. I find that if I do wash them in the morning it is easier for me. I am able to move quickly and collect any dishes that may not have been placed in the sink.
“My husbands glass for example”
Every night he gets a cup almost like clock work. He will then use that cup for the remainder of the night, in the morning I get up grab it and wash everything at once. Sometimes doing the same thing can be tedious, my mornings allow me to switch things up based on my mood. Also just doing double the work is just to time consuming.
Being a parent you learn to manage you time to be more efficient. Using common sense and thinking smart.
Oh yea I must have forgotten to mention that I have titles on my kitchen floor. The real big bully ones that are just simply out to ruin my life.
Yes those are the ones
Well they accumulate a lot of dirt from the heavy foot traffic around the house. I’m not quite sure how they get so dirty being as though we do not wear shoes in the home.
But that’s neither here nor there but simply for another post. I make sure that my kitchen is clean because for some odd reason that is always the first room to become dirty throughout the day. Which means constant cleaning for me. Or so I thought, when I started to get up and clean my kitchen it the morning it became easier for me to establish a pattern.
Getting up in the morning didnt seem so bad. Now I get up in the morning clean and then I clean again in the evening. This eliminates the amount of time I spend in the kitchen.
Cleaning the kitchen actually pertains to really cleaning the kitchen. Wiping down everything, making sure that everything is in the correct place.
No it does not have to be extremely neat,tidy, or perfect. It just has to manageable for you.
I am normally a vaccum mom, but being as though I am an early riser I have to rely on a broom for most of my cleaning in the a.m. I normally sweep all the rooms in my home not just my kitchen. It makes no sense to sweep one room when the others need to be swept as well. That would be just making double work for yourself and we don’t want that.
This is where it becomes just self explanatory, but keep it clean.
I vaccum it make sure that I am absolutely sure I have not missed any thing. Whether it be in a crack or corner I know that I took all necessary actions to eliminate the dirt and dust.
Finally, when I get here I know that it’s almost me time. You know that little time that you do get to yourself. I make sure that I mop all of the floors to ensure that all the dirt has been lifted and that the floor is actually clean.
If you dont feel that the floor is clean you could in fact create new mop water and clean the surface again.
I believe this to be a great morning routine. It allows me to focus on some of the main things that are important. Think of it this way how would I accomplish mopping while my 1 year old is around. Not likely it would just become more harder for me, if you have to stress this than it’s to complicated. Complication needs no company.
As of late I have been struggling with my girls constant bickering back and forth. Let me be the first to say I don’t like arguing especially when my kids do it.
The reasons as to why kids argue can be a variety of reasons. It doesn’t matter if you have boys or girls arguing is inevitable. Most of the reasons are dumb and dont really make sense but to kids they have got a good case.
My girls normally fuss about dumb things such as being on the wrong side of the room. My girls share a room in which is divided by a curtain. I try to keep them apart because my 7 year old like her time.
No matter what the reason my be its never valid enough for a arguement.
Fixing The Problem
Now I have not fully come to a recommendation for all moms. I guess it simply depends on your children but the same methods normally work.
Spanking (last alternative)
T I M E O U T
My kids absolutely hate time out but time out is more than a childs birthday. Some people go by the childs age but in when reality real time limits will suffice.
I normally start my kids on a 5 minute time out. No not the make believe time out where you count in your head lose count and then just say okay time served. Really take the time to discipline you child, place a timer on your phone to help you.
No matter how much they may cry do not give into that little thing called mom guilt. It’s all about sticking to your word and following through.
We all know about punishment, it that I’ve talk to you about this before. Yet here we are again, children do what you allow them to.
This is an effective way to get your child to actual pay attention. Giving them time to reflect on the actual problem at hand. Taking away things that they enjoy to show them that this is a privilege not something just given.
There is no time frame on punishment it’s mainly up to you. Given the current situation you may see fit to punish them for a day or two.
Remember after the punishment is completed talk to you child and reflect. Help them to understand the reasoning once more and the consequences should it happen again.
No one likes to spank there kids but sometimes it is necessary. Alot of people say that they do not spank there kids and I dont know how true that is but I doubt it to be true.
When I first became a mom I said that I would never spank my kids. That soon changes when I became a mom. Sometimes children don’t listen and it warrants for a spanking.
This would be considered a last resort. Of course I’m not saying let’s just spank them for everything but do as you see fit. Again this is the last resort.
Now I’m not saying that the arguing will stop immediately. It will show them that it is not okay to argue. It should not resort to spanking, mainly time out works and punishment.
I cant even begin to tell you the week that I had, so recently zoii turned 1 and I feel like my world just flipped upside down. To me I kind of felt like where did time go, dammit she is getting older which means i’m getting older. Now that her birthday has come and gone i feel a little more relaxed about it. I always get really anxious around birthdays but that’s just me.
Now that she is 1 I am anxious all over again now not because she is one but because this is where its starts to get tricky. You can expect your baby to be in a whole mess of things, your home will never be the same. If you expected to keep a clean house with a baby I wouldn’t bank on it.
What should you do?
Lock Up Cabinets
If you haven’t already I would baby proof everything if you like me then you are also covering the table corners as well. In reality you have to see it for what it is that nothing is safe at this point.
When I say replace everything I simply mean that if you may have items that are close to the floor I would advise you to move them higher. To babies anything and everything is something wonderful and colorful, but they do not know better and so you always have to be aware.
I for one am not for glass I don’t like i nor do I keep it in my home for fear that my kids might knock it over and break it. I tend not to do things that I know will make me uneasy, buying glassware for me is not necessary. If you don’t want it broken then I suggest you put it out of your child’s reach. Sometimes putting it up higher is okay but I would not recommend it.
This is an absolute must and if your a mom when you get to lock you cabinets it’s a sign that you have reached another milestone. If your like me and keep your cleaning supplies under your sink than this is for you. I would strongly urge that when you baby proof your cabinet you make sure that they are really shut and locked.
I know that as a mom I need time to myself but the question is, “Why is it so hard to enjoy it”. When I get time for me and put my mom status on vacation even if it’s for a brief moment it kills me.
Why you may ask because I am so used to hearing my kids run through the house and breathe life into it all around. When they are not around the house seems lonely and somewhat abandoned. My kids are a part of me and when they leave I do miss them a great deal.
Someone inve bashed me for allowing my children to go to their grandparents during the weekend. I thought to myself your a mom how can you judge me for doing what’s best for me. You simply cant all moms are different in more ways than one.
I soon realized that over a period of time that I had to come to realization that I matter to. Being able to focus on me helps me to be better, more patient, understanding, calm. Its everything that you need to feel in order for you to find peace.
So tonight is one if those nights at first there was 3 and now there is 2. I know you guys are saying that’s not a break. Oh but it is and when you have more then 1 you crave that me time.
So tonight is for me. It may sound cheesy but if I’m lucky I will get a weekend vacation this go round. My me time will be spent painting my home with my husband. Two birds one stone and I have just managed to spend quality time while having me time.
The time is approximately 4:52 and I must say that this is one of my good days where I should he sleeping. For some odd reason that is never the case when you have kids.
Not sure why but for some odd reason my kids are in my bed tapping me. Mommy wake up , no hun go back to sleep. When she says okay that is the time when I believe Ive reached an achievement. Of course not because that would be to easy.
And Then There Were 3
Mommy,I tried to sleep but now we are all up, I am at a loss for words but my reaction was kind of “hey I’m annoyed and exhausted” dont you guys know how to sleep. I myself dont believe that this is the right thing that should be happening, but how do I get all 3 back to sleep.
Back To Sleep Kiddos?
Here is the honest truth sometimes they will go back to sleep and sometimes they will not.Having a back up plan for this is a great way to ensure no mischief happens. Long story short my kids WILL NOT GO BACK TO SLEEP.
What to do?
The television is never my go to but when it is 5 minutes to 5 what other option is beneficial. I turn the television on so at least I know that they will lay down and eventually go back to sleep.
What About The Tv?
Now mama’s dont judge, the answer here is simple and I know that mama’s dont think it highly of it. Given this current time me and my television became great friends. Now do I turn on cartoons of course not. Everything is clearly educational. The options here are limited.
Does this work all the time no, mostly for my oldest. Zuri and Zanai. Zoii on the other hand that’s a totally different story. I had developed this method simply because it works for me. Also it keeps my kids sitting down and being quiet. One by one they slowly fall back to sleep.
I remember when my oldest children were one and it was not as hard as my third. We are now approaching the glorious number 1.
In the beginning everything seemed to be going great and according to plan. Now here we are just weeks away from one and my daughter has developed different habits that drive me nuts.
Wanting to be carried all the time
Tantrums on and off
I’m not sure what this is about but I’m sure that it can be fixed. Most moms experience things such as these but they handle them differently. Obviously because we are all different.
My daughter has always been a loner she plays with her sisters of course. However on the other hand she tends to stay to herself relaxing while she watches her shows. As of late she has been crying a lot more. When I walk into the room she begins to cry and reach for me. When I pick her up she simply just wants to be held 24/7. Th is is not a good idea by far, so i let her crawl instead as I sit in the floor playing with her. This will eliminate the want to be constantly held and also helps her engagement and interaction.
Zoii has never been big on the whole crying scene. As of late all of that has gone out the window. You know the sitting on my lawn whole ordeal. She crys on and off constantly throughout the day and there will literally nothing wrong. Of course you have to check for all the reasons she could be crying.
No my zoii was nothing above she simply just wanted to have her loud outbursts alone. It’s all funny really when you see it first hand.
Imagine sitting in the room watching elmo and she just starts to cry. She never makes eye contact but rather looks as if she is watching a sad movie of some sort. I dont really know how to describe it other than that.
I normally get tantrums around the time that she has to get dressed. As if she doesnt want to or simply just wants to give me a hard time. Sometimes it’s hard to tell but I never rule out both. It seems as though no is majority of my vocabulary now.
At first I couldnt get my little one to sleep and now it has become a bigger issue. It basically got better before it got worst if that makes sense. Now she goes right to sleep but the problem is that her sleep at night is consistent with her afternoon. Meaning she only sleep for a couple of hours and then she wakes up cries out the blue and back to sleep. Call me crazy if I think it weird.
I am seeing a great deal of change and not that there are bad but challenging. So many of these issues can easily be fixed but it is a preference of mom.
Have you ever experienced anything like this with your little one?