My 5 year Old Is Having a Tantrum| What’s Next?

In This Blog You Will Find

  • Tantrums of 5
  • Patience
  • Discipline Methods

Down Right Crazy Days

Today stared just like any other and everything was going smooth until my 5 year started the same old crap. She ever so often tries this temper tantrum crap with me and dad in hopes to get her way. I mean like what are the odds that this would actually happen. You have to at least admire her efforts.

Ugh Not Again

I feel like I keep going in circles with the tantrums. I know that they are reoccuring ever so often but my goodness. Tantrums for me are really emotional because I have all girls. 5 year old’s that throw tantrums

  • Aggression against both people and objects if not both
  • The tantrums tend to be longer
  • Not able to get back to a calm state

Don’t Freak Out

I know that when kids do become like this it can be very hard for a parent to not explode. In this situation you have to have patience. What they don’t tell you is that sometimes patience will not take that extra mile with you. You have patience probably all the way up to the moment you explode, then it’s abandon ship.

What am I to do with you

Most people don’t want to admit that their kids misbehave. There’s nothing to be ashamed of we all go through it. If each and every child was perfect what could we possibly teach them.

On that note what are some of the best options when dealing with tantrums? Now lean in this is on a need to know basis. Just kidding I try to refrain from spanking, this is the last resort.

  • Express the cons of their actions
  • Give Your Child a Verbal Warning
  • Timeout (I do at least 10 minutes, it normally takes my kids a little longer to wind down)
  • Punishment (Sometimes a day or more depending on what got them punished in the first place)

Don’t you think?

This is just a way to test your limits and to ensure that you are capable of handling something like this. You are stronger than this. In some cases I know that sometimes us as parents really do go through it. I want you to know that it is okay you are not alone. Parenting a 5 year old is hard nevertheless more than one children. Having structure is the best option. Make sure that when you are disciplining the kids you and your spouse are on the same page.

I’m no Baby

Not That It Matters But Uh,

Call me weird but I have been pondering about something for quite some time. My daughter is 1 is she a toddler? I mean I am far from one of those moms that counts months. If you were to walk up to me and say my child is 46 I’m going to give you the blank stare. Yes I am one of them. Once zoii started walking I said that’s no baby and I started calling her a toddler.

The age of a toddler

Believe it or not this i a very common question in the motherhood community. Especially the first time moms so you and I, we are not alone. A toddler is a child from 12 to 36 months.

I prefer the easier way 1 to 3 years. So with that in mind my baby is in fact a toddler. It’s not a big deal or anything but this is a milestone for me. Becoming a mom of three I just knew I wouldn’t make it. I knew this wasn’t true but i was simply a thought. A common one I think that most moms deal with.

Expectations Tsk, Tsk

Now that we have established the toddler crisis, are you ready for what comes next? When your child turns one generally you will start to see them do a variety of things. If they are not doing them already.

Glitter, Sparkle 1

At this age you child should be able to

  • sit down without assistance
  • Crawl on both hands and knees (some may even be walking)
  • Pull themselves up utilizing furniture

Are you excited because I definatley am. Need I not say that maybe it’s best for you to baby proof your home. We do not want any sharp corners harming anyone.

Level Up

I don’t know about you but I feel like I just accomplished something great. Random thought it’s not like I haven’t been through this before. It’s just something about being able to relive it has me over the moon.

Loc Journey: Bye Bye Product You’ve Let Me Down

So when I first started my loc journey (a week ago let’s be honest) I was super excited still am. There is no doubt about that. Here’s my issue when I first started my locs almost a year ago prior to this time. I used the most common thing Jamaican and Lime Locking Wax. Although it wasn’t until after that I started seeing bad reviews about this. It lede to stop using this product but not so much the reviews but for a personal viewpoint. It was way to greasy and made my hair feel weighed down with guck. Also the smell was okay but not so much pleasant after a night sleep. I’m not saying don’t use this (but your pillows will thank me.) So this go around I decided to switch to up. I wanted something that wouldn’t be really heavy or greasy on my hair. So I did my research.

Just beyond

After doing a good amount of research I seem to have found something that works for me. Not to be confused as a product only for me.😂 Its really people out there like that, but you keep on shining. It has all of the necessities that I was looking for including that key component. Yes, moisture see we just agreed on something. As of recently I have found myself falling back into love with Cantu. Now they have a local line as well can you even begin to grasp that accomplishment. This is something beautiful I am actually totally stoked that they have taken this route.

Rolling Out

This product is a life saver I am currently retwisting my hair as I type. Now I know your probably like really and yes really I am a firm believer in blogging from anywhere. Anyway back to this awesome find. I have this thing about really sticky and messy hair products. This causes me to stay away from certain things but its okay I can live with that, but not without this. This has a funny texture but more along the lines of a more solid putty. Its doesn’t make a great deal of mess and can be shaken or placed in hand to observe.

Before the Tide

It was almost similar to this but more firmer. After I did my first go around of starter locs I used it and my hair came out beautiful. Unfortunately they did not stay in. Trust me we will address that later in another entry. However if you have not tries this product I suggest you don’t even waste you money on this. It causes a great deal of frizz and your locks will keep unraveling. You are basically stopping yourself from entering into your growth period. Now I gave this product the benefit of the doubt because I don’t listen to other people. I have to pass my own judgement and yes this is a thing that most if not all people do.

Not being a favorite of mine costing me about 5.99 in retail. It really is not worth the time nor effort. I am very disappointed because I had high hopes that they would redeem themselves. No such luck on my end.When it comes to hair in general you have to be very careful what you put into it. This is not something to take lightly. Love your hair and be you.

What is your favorite products to use on your locs?

Tantrums| Not In My House Hija

We are in that phase mama where you tell your toddler no and she literally has a moment of weakness. She simply cannot understand why she can’t do what she wants. I am okay with that but when she starts being extra now we have a problem.

Upgraded Motions

Zoii has been throwing her little tantrums for a period of time now that she is 1 and walking. Today I saw something new from her. Drinking juice in the living room she began to spill it. So what is your first instinct because mine is I don’t want to be stuck cleaning up spilled juice. So mommy took it, yes but that doesn’t make me a bad person. Zoii looked at me and the n she tuned up like one of those old fire fighter trucks back in time. She looked at me mama’s not budging on this sorry hon. No lie she instantly stopped crying and turned to me and slapped me.

She did what?

Yes she slapped mama, I looked at my husband and I said did you see that? I mean I was in complete shock. Maybe because my other girls never did this they common crying of course but hitting nope. I looked at her we have eye contact, I took to fingers and taped her little hands.

Disciplined capital “D”

I know some parents may be against spanking, popping but I learned from my previous mistakes. My 7 year old grew up fast and before I knew it she was mouth all mighty tongue everlasting. Me and my husband were like oh we don’t want to spank our kids. The reason being we used to get spankings when we were little.(its not uncommon just not spoken of openly) I mean who wants that, but I’ve come to realization that from those spanking I learned a valuable lesson. Stop Being Dumb, you get spankings for dumb things so the only solution would be to stop doing them. My daughter was living proof or lacking discipline. Yes I was that mouthy kids mom but that ship quickly sailed.

Don’t Prejudge Me

This is what I believe to be true but I do believe that discipline is a Must when it comes to your children. You can only take but so much, so I stopped feeling bad for popping my kids hands or spanking them. Only when it is needed, like if I told you a billion times not to do something. Then when you get in trouble you expect there to be no consequences.

That’s Just Down Right Bananas.

Raise sweet little humans, mine are from Mars

I do understand that you want you child to behave and yes it starts with you. It takes a village to raise a child or at least that is what I was raised on. The outcome of this would be that enstilling certain traits and behaviors in our littles now could mean less problems in motherhood, parenthood later on down the line.

Think about it, what type of forms of discipline do you use for tantrums?

Quarantine|with the Husband

I know a lot of woman will agree when I say that this quarantine has been hell. I knew that in the beginning it was going to be hard when my husband had to stay home. Hard in the terms of he has ADHD and so he has to stay active or he becomes a Nagitha Kristie. Just yap yap yap. We generally avoid this but being as though we literally have nothing to do. We are stuck and so we have been trying to cope with everything.

Then you throw kids in the mix its hell on wheels but at least they keep him occupied for the most part. You know how sometimes when people get stuck with each other for a long period of time. They start to get on each others nerves, now I know some people that would beg to differ. (appearances) I am going to be bluntly honest, my husband has been driving me up a wall. At first I couldn’t make sense of it because when he was always at work I missed him. Then I was kinda complaining because I did miss him. Now I have come to realization that we have just been stuck in the same place each other. There is absolutely the worst thing ever if I watch another Netflix stream I might just lose my eyes.

Now we have come up with different things to help keep us busy during quarantine. Its not as bad as before, I wanted to Bart Simpson strangle him. For him annoying me is all in good fun. Sometimes he complains that I need to smile more. Obviously my husband is the playful overboard. He always means well and always makes me smile so I’m good there.

I hope that after quarantine when things get moving again. We can get back to where we were. Until then I can make it, he’s not going to get my sanity lol. Once moms lost it dads not far behind. 😜

Why is my little crying

Photo by Ba Phi on Pexels.com

So my youngest daughters has been having these outburst sometimes she will cry other times it just feel like she is yelling. I cant seem to figure out why at first I thought hey maybe she’s just teething, you know the typical things. Now that time has passed and the change in the weather she has a new reason to cry because now she is sick.

I absolutely hate and yes I know hate is a strong word but I really hate colds. I dont really get sick thank goodness for that but my girls do and then it’s time to become super mom.

Image result for kids with colds

What is the first thing that you do when your child gets sick. Everyone’s first reaction is to give them motrin, zarbees, and or tylenol. Then it’s the wonderful spontaneous trip to the pediatrician or aftercare.

Now this is where its gets semi complicated for me. I dont like hospitals or doctors offices but I understand the complex need for them. Medication for me is another downfall. On my end I dont like to take medication because although it claims to help it only causes issues later on down the line. In most cases things become overlooked because it’s the easiest way. Why not try natural remedies to help you depending on what you have.

For that we all know where to go pinterest am I right. Or we tend to do research so that we can better understand for ourselves as to what can and will work.


But first lets have Tea


You see pinterest is like a platform for all the amazing wonderful things the world has to offer. People like me use it more often than others just to find different things. No I dont just search for natural remedies, gosh.

So what would be some good natural remedies for just a change in the weather common cold

  • Ginger
  • Tea
  • Peppermint
  • Honey
  • Cinnamon
  • Onions

Onions

Just wait and hear me out about the onion don’t get your layers in a bunch. When I was a little person and I used to get colds I would take a long tube sock and put an onion inside. Call it weird but the onion actually helps with the fever almost like a magnet.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Everything else is just natural and the most commonly used by people in general when you get a cold. In my opinion yes this is just simply me saying well I prefer natural over anything, any day. The risks of having a cup of tea has less health risks. Now if you are really sick and it’s not a common cold then you should take your good old doctors advice.

So because my daughter has a cold i am going to give here little noses to help bring her fever down, wrap an onion around her little leg (not too tight), and give her some green tea to soothe her. I know everyone does things differently but if something works for not just you but your family as a whole I say go for it.


Question

When your little gets sick what do you. What is your routine?

Keeping Kids Busy

If your a stay at home mom then you may know the feeling f being unable to work and have your kids around. It simply just cannot be done, or can it. In most cases if we need something we will find a way to get it done in this case working from home can be frustrating to both you and your child not unless you gain a strategy as to how to keep them busy while you work.

Here we are going to come up with a couple of ways to help mom be more productive and get more done. Having something to distract your child is always the way to go plus it will allow you to focus with less anxiety.


Keeping Them Busy

  • Make Time for Play Time
  • Create a Space for them
  • Add Technology Into The Mix
  • Throw Backs
  • Always be Prepared

Play Time

I know that working to make an income, but spending time with your child is more important and it allows you to make a better bond. Obtain a schedule to map out play time and when it will be. Make time for what is important.

Creating Space

You will want a designated place for your child to play being as though you don;t want them to go from room to room wreaking havoc and making a mess. Let them know that this is their area, say for instance if you are working in the living room place your child somewhere within that room. This allows you to have space, and them allowing you to keep an eye on them as they play.

My daughter is 5 and she is very very busy so when I start to work I make sure that she is always in the same room with me and she has an activity to keep her occupied and focused.

The Wonders of Tech

I know we as moms don’t like the fact that this whole generation is being raised solely on technology now so when people suggest technology you like nope. I was kind of like that too until I started researching. If your a mom like me then you want you kid to be productive on technology so I strongly advise you to find learning sites.

ABC Mouse is Good (Only Go’s To Age 7) Teaches your children a great deal of thing including how to read this is something that parents should look into. I love you tube but not so much for my kids because not all content is for them.

ABCya! Is another good one but this site is mainly focused towards the older children K-5

Throw Backs

Remember when you were younger and your mom use to find ways to keep you occupied so she would get ideas maybe about crafts, workbooks, or coloring. These are what I like to call throwbacks, some of the things that you can share with your children.

Always Have a Back Up

When all else fails what can you rely on to keep your child focused and having fun so that you can continue to work. Always think of something else, something is better than nothing having a back up can make it easier for you and your child they will never get.

Nothing is ever as hard as it seems but if you take the time and gather different ideas so that you will be able to work then you will be A-Okay. You can find a wide variety of different activities in general and on pinterest.

How Do You Know If Your Baby is Teething

In This Post You Will Find

  • How do you know your baby is teething?
  • Teething Symptoms
  • Teething Time Frames
  • How long does it take for a tooth to erupt?
  • Teething baby tips
Image result for is my baby teething?

If you are a parent like me then you know that you will eventually get to this point in your life where your child starts teething . No, we are never ready for the simple things when it comes to children but hey we are all learning. We don’t just become the best parent overnight that would probably take a life time. Anyway let’s discuss the teething stage.

Is My Baby Teething?

Telling whether or not your baby is teething can be the easiest thing to figure out or the hardest being as though the symptoms do not show up in each individual baby but at lest one does.

Image result for woman asking a question

Some of the symptoms that you might experience is,

  • Irritability
  • Interrupted sleep patterns
  • Swelling of the gums
  • Drooling
  • Loss of appetite
  • Rash
  • Mild temperature
  • Constipation, Diarrhea
  • Increased nibbling
  • Increased gum rubbing
  • Increased ear rubbing.

Now as I said all babies are different and may show little to no symptoms if you spot any changes in your little one this could be a reason.

How Long?

Well I’m sorry to that time unfortunately not on you side and so this will be a long term battle parents. I can say that it get’s better because later on down the line as they get older they will not be as fussy.

So your little one will have at least twenty pearly whites that will eventually come in over a period of two years during this time your baby will experience pain and irritation. This will only be due to your babies tooth breaking through the gum.

How long does it take to erupt?

The breakdown is simple the lower set tends to press through before the upper set. The first set of upper and lower molars begin to push through well erupt if you will, between the ages of 13 -19 months. Canine teeth erupt  in both the upper and lower jaws

Food for thought so perhaps your still feeling over whelmed don’t worry we are here to help take a deep breathe and lets dive into how you can stay sane through this process.

My sanity matters too

The constant crying can be something dreadful to hear after a couple of minutes let alone hour that when things can take a toll on you. We all look for things that can both benefit us as well as our children. In this situation if your thinking well what can I do. Well look no further the answer is here.

How can I soothe my baby while teething?

This is nothing big and although we as moms have a preference as to our little ones and nursing them back to health but I’m going to share some tips with you to make this easier for everyone.

  • Rub your babies gums (clean finger or moistened gauze pad your preference)
  • Chill Out. A cold spoon or a chilled teething ring can be a beneficial factor on keeping your baby comfortable
  • Hard Foods it makes nibbling all the more fun
  • Keep bibs on hand for those long drool days
  • Try over the counter remedy
Image result for teething toy

How long does it take for babies teeth to full come in?

Years!

Yes I said years to be more specific your babies teeth will not fall out until his permanent ones are ready to come in. This is generally around 6, 7 years of age. So knowing what you know now you will be okay.

Trust Me I Know I’m A MOM.

What are some teething solutions that you use when it comes to your little one’s teething process? Please share and leave a comment.

The Parenting Road of Disagreements

Everyone is raised different and it’ your differences that make you uniquely you. Your up’s and downs are what make you stronger and prepares you for someday when you become a parent.What is the most common thing that couples fight about other than money, the fact that they don’t agree with the way the other parent chose to to parent the child.

I know your probably like that’s not me, me and my significant other never fight about something that ridiculous and I understand and I am happy that you have come to a common gorund. The reality here is that this is a real ongoing problem here and now, it may not major to most people but to those who want to know how to get to that safe place and understand why these problems keep occurring than keep reading .

It happened to me…

When I first became a mom me and my husband were happy and peachy but it wasn’t until my children began to get older that we had to start disciplining them. Now I know that some people frown upon discipline, they believe that a child only has to be talked to. Truth is there are a lot of different ways to discipline your child.

Long story short my daughters school relies on color codes in order to communicate with parents, my daughter would come home with constant yellow for the dumbest reasons. Say like she would be talking too much and she would get a yellow , things like that. I though it was idiotic to make a child feel like they did something wrong constantly, simply because you want them to stop talking.

Dad says hey you know that there has to be a consequence for you getting yellow

This is where the disagreement comes in because I had not been raised like that for every bad color I brought In I was punished only when it seemed as though I didn’t grasps the wrongs that I had done. I was always given a fighting chance to make things better, be better, and grow. My husband was raised on the ideas that a child who misbehaves should be punished or have some type of consequence. That’s just not the case here and so we have a disagreement on our hands. How can we solve this to get to a better mutual understanding?

Agree to Disagree That is the Question.

When parents don’t agree on parenting what should you do? Throwing a fit is simply out of the question because you don’t want your kids to see. What they see they will do and that’s not a habit you want your kids to pick up.

  • Find a common ground – Always look for the most positive parent discipline method that you can both agree on and stick to it
  • Ask yourself why are you having this disagreement? What is the actual problem? (This could be cause by there own previous childhood)
  • Start small- Find things that you can agree on (Respect, Family Values
  • Think long term – If I do this how will this affect them in the long run?
  • Pick out a signal that only you and your spouse to end the feud before it gets intense (It’s not good to yell in front of the kids, wait until you are alone with your significant other
  • Don’t do the good cop bad cops it only makes you more vulnerable in the child’s eyes. It makes them realize what they can get away with.
  • Commit to It (This is an ongoing process not an overnight job)

Got Conflict?

When it comes to conflict in general people act in a variety of ways you can never pin point what someone will do because they are angry or upset. The worst thing that could happen would be that you call each other names to make yourself feel better, but then I gues that would say a lot about your character right. So let’s be positive, think positive thoughts what can we do to fix the problem?

Here are 4 strategies proven effective

  • Accommodating
  • Avoiding
  • Collaborating
  • Compromising

Accommodating

Giving in is not the answer if you give in then what would be the point in saying anything at all. If you feel strongly about something address it in a more respectful way so that your partner can actually hear you. Now it is okay to accommodate if both of you agree.

Avoiding

This happens when one retreats from the issue at hand simply removing themselves from the situation. In some cases this is the best because we don’t want tempers flaring and words that we don’t mean being exchanged, Let’s not make more problems.

Collaborating

We all want the same thing why not come to a mutual agreement and work it out but be assertive to show that you mean what you say.

Compromising

Sometimes we all don’t get what we want but we have the ability to change so say he is a believer in punishment and you are a firm believer in talking to your children. Make that compromise okay the first time I will talk to you about the problems and see what we can do next time to do better . If you continue this type of behavior you will become punished.

Boom!

Show them you are serious and mean buissness!

We all have our differences but it is up to you to make that conscious as to whether or not you want to hash it out or become a bigger and better person.

Survival is the Concept

There are an array of things that moms go through but none ideal as to what awaits them when the become stay at home moms. Not that this is a bad thing and majority of the time this is a choice in which a mom has chosen this route. She feels that their are more benefits vs. the way she has been currently living. When you become a stay at home mom just like any other job but without the SANITY in a sens.

Yes you gave up you 9 – 5 because:

  • You want to raise you children
  • Educate them in depth the way you want
  • Have more bonding time
  • Or you simply want to do you own thing and just be a mom

The reasons are infinite but with the pros you best bet is that the cons are not that far behind.

What does it mean to become a stay at home Mom?

We have already addressed some reasons as to why you may want or become a stay at home mom. On the other hand there is a bigger picture here.

  • Losing your identity. You were a bright and vibrant woman who always kept herself up now your wearing pj’s with banana nut squash on it.
  • Missing adult interaction: Not being able to hang put with your friends on you lunch break, Not really leaving the house unless you have to
  • Financial dependence on another: Having to depend on you spouse to obtain the finances that you may have
  • Answering unnecessary questions: What made you become a stay at home mom?, you don’t miss going to work everyday?

This is what you should consider when you become a stay at home mom, now if your like me you simply don’t care because this was a good decision based off of my family and income. No matter what your reasons are if you can get through this then you got it. Disregard the baby and yet keep moving, keep inspiring others when they ask “Do you like being a stay at home mom?”

I love it but that’s just me I have endured 2 if not all things listed above and I am steadfast about my decision, why because I am m e and what matters at the end of the day is my family.

How do you as a SAHM survive?

There are days when I just want throw the towel in and lock myself in my room but some of us don’t have that luxury and so we have to bite the bullet and deal. When I first started this journey I kept thinking to myself I cant do this. There would be times when I would call my husband overwhelmed and upset because everything was chaos. But once I got the hang of it I found that as long as I have a structured plan then my day would stop being so hectic. It’s really simple if I can do it then so can you.

Steps to How I Survive

  • Get you a game plan ready the night before….
  • Grab a little bit of fresh air take an outing…
  • Look for free things such as museums or the aquariam …
  • Exchange your number with other mom don’t be scared this can lead to play dates, social interaction for both you and your child|ren….
  • Exercise. …
  • Do something for yourself once per week (at least), engage in a want it’s okay you have earned it. …
  • Make the time you spend with your kids memorable

This also goes hand in hand with patience and I can honestly say that I lacked this very detail. I know that when I had my children I had to learn this concept really fast, kind of a sink or swim ordeal. I chose to swim because my kids and family mean the world to me.

Lacking Patience?

How can I be a patient mom is what I used to ask myself and each time I fell short even after I heard my first daughter it was smooth sailing. As she got older however I found that I was becoming extremely overwhelmed very fast. This is not a good trait to possess and so I decided that I was going to fix it because nothing god could come from that. It would just lead me down a road of self destruction. So lets figure out how we can be more productive in becoming patient.

  • Count to 10. (gives you a chance to step back from the situation)
  • Deep breaths
  • What would mom do? …
  • Weigh out you options…(How does this help?)
  • Take a break.
  • Laugh

Counting

Now when I say counting there is no right and wrong way to do this it’s as simply as it sounds but the overall outcome is that it works. It’s kind of like while you are counting you meditating, making sure that while you are counting you are also remaining calm.

Deep Breath…

Take a minute to step back from the situation and take deep deep breaths before just reacting this gives you time to analyze the situation, weighing the good and the bad outcomes.

What would Mom do?

Now be rational because you are a mom and your not just going to go off the rails and start throwing a tantrum. You have to be rational as if it was ever a choice. So ask yourself again “What Would Mom DO?

Find a Solution, Act on a Teachable Moment

Life’s lessons are what stay embedded in our children even after we are gone so embrace them with open arms knowing that instead of yelling you made the right decision as a MOM.

Weighing the good and the bad?

We all have choices but it’s the choices you make that will affect you forever. Make a mental list of the good and the bad and what would be your best possible outcome for the decision at hand.

Should I take a break?

Hmmm, should you take a break well geez let me think. A lot of people say that your a mom you don’t get or need breaks. A mom is sometimes discussed as an around the clock type job, you don’t have free time when you became a mom you gave that all up.

Well I beg to differ I am a mom of 3 and I take breaks if and when I need them. I’m not saying your having a bad day and the kids have drilled you down and you are on your last leg you just lock yourself in you bedroom. Simply ask your significant other if they can lend a helping hand. Or lay your children down for a map, I am a firm believer in naps. Why, you may ask because that’s my time to just be me not mom just for an hour out of they day. If you follow the tips i’m sharing then this may be rarely used.

Laugh out Loud…

We sometimes forget that we are all human and each of us has an imperfection somewhere but we are not as perfect as we may thing. We are in fact imperfect in a sense so In saying so things do happen, sometimes you just have to embrace it. Like your toddler sees his grandparents through a glass and runs into the glass. Although you may be scared that they are hurt you have to laugh because it doesn’t occur to you yet how the glass was not seen.

-Laughable Moment

What are your thoughts on this topic?